It's Only Crazy Til It Happens - My "Crazy Faith" Receipt

If you followed any of the “Crazy Faith” series with Pastor Mike Todd at Transformation Church in Tulsa, then you probably already know what I’m talking about when I say “faith receipt.” If not, well… I’m about to tell you.

I have been dropping faith receipts for about the last three years. Ever since God first called me out of my “regular” life into what can only be described as a CRAZY journey with Him.

Even though I grew up “religious” (I now hate that word), then completely lost interest in all things God-related until I actually became saved/a believer 15 years ago, it wasn’t really until 3 (almost 4 years) ago, that I feel like my real relationship with God actually started.

Even that started a little crazy. When He unexpectedly had me yanked out of my living situation with nowhere else to go and told me that it was all part of His plan and that I had to learn to “trust and follow Him now.” Looking back, I don’t know why I didn’t freak out more actually. Other than that He had spent months and months before that developing an intimacy and trust between us that I wanted to follow Him.

So, thus began my three and a year year journey of being “nomadic” (a.k.a. homeless) where I went wherever the Lord led me. Sometimes, I stayed with friends or family, sometimes I was in a hotel, sometimes I was travelling around speaking and other times, I was camped in my car! But, it was always for a purpose. Whether I was staying with someone who needed my help spiritually or physically, or just simply to further grow my obedience and trust in Him.

I have “crazy” stories of amazing connections, powerful lessons and supernatural provision (which will be my next book!). But, the biggest thing my journey through the proverbial “wilderness” was doing… besides healing, refining, preparing and equipping me for my purpose… was building my FAITH.

Because at the end of the day, faith is what it’s all about.

The definition of faith is “complete trust or confidence in someone or something.” And that’s exactly what God was building… step by painstaking step… my complete trust and confidence in Him.

In His kind yet determined way, He kept molding me and shaping me, transforming me and reforming me until I really believed. Believed He is who He says He is. Believed I am who He says I am. And most importantly, believed that when He says something, He means it. Period. Done. End of story.

Which is why I am where I am today.

I didn’t just wake up one morning and go, “I think I’m going to go be completely insane for God today!”

No, He definitely took me on a journey to get here. But, I had to agree to go along for the ride. I had to say okay. And multiple times throughout, I had to give Him “permission” to do what He wanted to do… even if it was through teary eyes and gritted teeth.

But, it’s all brought me here. To a place where I know (and I mean KNOW) without a shadow of a doubt, that when God says something, it will be.

“God is not man, that he should lie, or a son of man, that he should change his mind. Has he said, and will he not do it? Or has he spoken, and will he not fulfill it?” (Numbers 23:19)

God is not a man. So, we can’t base our expectations of Him on what we are used to in dealing with man. He does not lie. He does not change His mind. So, if He says it, it is done.

It may not happen right away. And it might not even happen in the exact way we expected to it. In fact, everything in the natural may appear to be the exact opposite of what He said. But, that’s where faith comes in!

Abraham was too old to have a baby, but he believed. Joseph was a nobody, ended up enslaved and imprisoned, but he believed the vision God gave him about becoming a ruler. Noah had never seen rain, but he built an ark. David only had rocks and a slingshot, but he believed God would give him victory.

Faith is about believing God. Plain and simple.

So, even though I had had many small tests along the way, my first BIG test was this past February when the Lord told me to go to the grand opening celebration at Transformation Church in Tulsa. He told me to GO and trust that He would not fail me. Except, did I mention that on the surface it appeared that I only had 15 miles in my gas tank and 83 cents to my name?

It was a crazy faith moment for sure. But again, God had brought me so far in my relationship with Him, that I trusted Him! Even though it made no sense in the natural, I knew He wouldn’t fail me because I know Him.

So, I went and of course, He showed up in AMAZING ways the entire trip! It turned out to be a powerful testimony not only for myself, but for everyone who heard the story (you can watch my video testimony here.)

But, little did I know that it was actually a practice round or “training,” so to speak. Because now a few months later, I have found myself having to move in crazy faith again. But this time, times like a thousand.

If you’ve read any of the prophetic words I’ve released about the virus stuff or watched any of the videos I shared about it, you know that God told me from the very beginning to live my life as normal. To be an example of what it looks like to walk in freedom. Because again, I am standing on the word that I am protected by the blood of Jesus, so there is nothing to fear.

Surprisingly even to me, I was able to walk in freedom and not fear without any issue. I was just calm. Unworried, unafraid. Which in and of itself is a HUGE testimony to the transforming power of Jesus since I used to be nothing but a big ol’ ball of worry, fear and anxiety.

But, since I was still on this “nomadic” journey, I had been living with some family members for a few months when this all came about, so I found myself in a bit of a contrasting situation. Although I was walking around living my life like normal, things came to a point where my relatives wanted to “lock down” and stop leaving the house. Which of course meant, as their houseguest, I had to stay in too.

I knew in that moment, that I had a choice. To go backward and live in a way that I had been freed from and was contradictory to what God instructed me to do. Or to move forward into what seemed like an impossible situation - leave shelter and comfort, with virtually nowhere to go.

(This faith walk is no joke, I’ll tell ya that!)

The Lord likened it to the story of the Israelites in Exodus one morning in my quiet time. He said just like they had come out of slavery in Egypt and were then faced with “nowhere to go” in front of the Red Sea, this was my personal “Red Sea” moment. I had a choice… to go backward into “slavery” or go forward with “nowhere to go” (a.k.a. into a completely shutdown world).

So, in crazy faith, I chose the latter.

I knew I really had no choice. I wasn’t going back. I couldn’t go back. I had to keep moving forward. After all, I couldn’t just talk the talk, I had to walk the walk.

So, I stepped out in faith with once again, about $4 to my name and 20 miles in my gas tank. This time, with no idea where I was going though.

Now, on a side note, I did have an idea of the “big picture.” And this is where this becomes a “faith receipt.” Because I have known for awhile now that God is leading me to the house that He has for me. I posted about that on my Instagram too, back when Pastor Charles did the “Stating Faith” sermon.

I didn’t care how crazy I looked… I put it ALL out there. How, back in 2015, when the tiny house that I had built completely fell apart on me, God had said to me, “next time, let me do it My way.” How I lived with a roommate for another two years after that. And then, how He had called me into a crazy nomadic journey. All the while, confirming for me that He had a house for me when the time was right.

Back in the fall, He told me that my house was ready. And in January, when I was unable to make the payments on the storage unit that housed all of my belongings and it was auctioned off, He told me to surrender it all to Him. I did, knowing that He would replace anything that I needed and make sure anything that wasn’t replaceable made its way back to me (which it did, when the person who bought it unexpectedly gave me four boxes full of photos, letters and other keepsakes).

It all looked crazier and crazier, but I didn’t care. Because it was just being set-up more and more for God to do what He does… miracles.

(In fact, this is only one of the crazy promises I am standing on… there are others for my ministry, my marriage and some other things I am going to do for people. But, we’ll just stick to the house/provision one for now.)

So, knowing God’s promise and receiving consistent confirmation from Him is a big part of how I was able to step out in faith. Because I knew the direction I was headed. But, the other important thing was something He taught me on my trip to Tulsa - taking things one day at a time.

Now, can I just say, I would have previously thought I was the last person that would be able to do that. Remember, I said I was a world-class worrier like my mom used to be. But again, Jesus has changed me so much that I’ve learned to take things just like I did on my trip. One day at a time. Or even, one need at a time.

And the thing is, He always goes before me anyway. It might take a minute for me to get my feet under me and get some momentum, but as soon as I step out, He meets me. Just like on my trip, I have ended up with provision before I even needed it.

I have received unexpected donations from people who saw my Tulsa testimony video or my Instagram stories. A friend messaged me that God told her to give me a very exact amount of money - which just happened to be the exact cost of one night in the hotel. A writing job even appeared out of nowhere.

Literally, provision each day, as I needed it. For a place to stay, food to eat, even my bills being paid. The crazy thing is, I am in a better position now than before I stepped out of my “secure” situation!

So, that is where I am now. Out here, walking through the Red Sea as the Lord continues to make a way through. And I know what’s waiting on the other side because He’s told me.

So, I am putting this out here now as a faith receipt. So, when it happens, He will get the glory. So people who do know Him will get a boost to their faith. And people that don’t know Him will know that He’s real.

Because nothing that happens from this point forward is by my doing. I am in about the most vulnerable, non-self-sufficient position you can be in. And that’s when God can really show off!

I am just a willing vessel. An example or a pattern of what He wants to do with everyone. He LOVES His children! I repeat… He LOVES His children! He wants to take care of them. And He wants to go back to the original design of the way He intended things to be.

So, I am excited for what He’s about to do. Not just for myself being in it, but because of how it will speak to those who see it happen.

Cuz after all, it’s only crazy til’ it happens.

And it’s about to happen.